


Coming of Age

by DevBasaa



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Durincest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-14
Updated: 2013-12-17
Packaged: 2018-01-04 15:53:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1082901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DevBasaa/pseuds/DevBasaa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set before the events of the Hobbit, Fili struggles with helping Kili through a new era in a dwarf's life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> I started this long ago and then got bogged down by RL. Thanks to Desolation of Smaug, I feel inspired and dove into old works to complete them. I hope you enjoy!

~*~  
Part I  
~*~

Fili had settled himself on a sweet patch of grass in the yard and smiled as a cool breeze ruffled his hair. He had his leather tooling knife and the wrist guards he’d fashioned for Kili sitting in his lap. Just a few more hours of work and he could finally give them to his brother. Fili smiled wider. He couldn’t wait to see Kili’s face when he tried them on and then practiced with them. Fili made sure they would match Kili’s quiver, too, make him look complete.

However his mood damped when his mother came to his side, tugged on one of his braids and asked the question he’d been dreading since last week:

“Have you asked him?”

Fili pursed his lips. He swore his mother was fixated on this! She hadn’t harped on him when he’d come of age, why did she fret so about Kili’s decision—his very /personal/ decision.

Fili looked up at his mother. “Is it really my business?”

His mother’s face fell, as if he’d said the most horrible curse to her. “You’re his brother! You’re supposed to look after him. Maybe he has questions. He’s been moping from the moment Dwalin mentioned it to him.”

Fili raised one brow. He rather doubted that; Kili hardly ever moped. “Mother—“

But she cut him off. “Ask him,” she said, in that voice that meant no more arguments, then she returned to the house.

Fili sighed. By Durin’s beard, he wasn’t going to hear the end of this until he asked. He’d put her off several times already, but she wouldn’t let it go. With a pang of regret to put his leather work aside, Fili climbed to his feet and headed for where his brother usually was at this hour: the river.

~*~

Fili had realized long ago that Kili liked the riverside because it recalled the only memory he had of their father. He’d talk of it with such wistfulness, of sitting on the riverbank with poles made from green saplings and thread and crickets tied to the end. He couldn’t remember why they didn’t have hooks.

Fili knew why, but didn’t have the heart to tell him. Kili loved that memory of their father and Fili would never take it away, never tell him that it was Fili—not their father—that Kili had fished with that day. They didn’t have hooks because Fili wasn’t allowed to use them without an adult, so he figured they could tie the crickets, not realizing how essential hooks were to fishing. They spent the afternoon feeding the fish, basically. Their father didn’t like fishing. It wasn’t becoming of a dwarf, he’d said. Fili remembered that.

“How long are you going to stand there staring at me?”

Fili chuckled and climbed the riverbank to sit in the shade of the oak tree next to his brother. Kili nudged him with his shoulder once he’d settled.

“Mother send you to find me?”

“Aye.”

“Does she have some chore for me?”

“No, she...” Fili didn’t have a single clue how he could broach this subject with Kili. “Uh, she’s just worrying about silly things.”

“Ah.” Kili pitched a stone into the river. The water ran clear here, like crystal shimmering in the sunlight. Further down it became muddied by the village folk. Paddlewheels stirred the dirt and waste dumped from the water ducting made it worse.

But here, the river was beautiful.

“Do you start your apprenticeship soon?” Kili asked.

Fili nodded, then said, “Aye.” Kili wasn’t really looking at him. Actually, he did seem a bit mopey—for Kili. He seemed calm, relaxed, but stared off into the distance as if lost to his thoughts.

Had he been that way since the little jibe from Dwalin?

Fili cleared his throat. He supposed it was now or never. “Kili, have you...um, you’re of an age that you could ask someone to...to be your first. Have you?”

Kili didn’t answer. In fact, he didn’t move at all, as if he suddenly had become stone before he said, simply, “No.”

Fili shifted and wracked his head for something sensible to say. He wasn’t used to feeling awkward around Kili. They did nearly everything together, grew up like two sides of the same coin, practically identical. Though, that wasn’t completely true. At Fili’s own coming of age, when he had his own decision to make, he distanced himself from Kili for a time. It’d been easier that way.

Fili cleared his throat again. “Ah, right. Well, there’s no rush of course. You can take all the time you need. Some don’t ask until they’re nearly sixty-five.”

Kili turned to him; his expression calm, but serious. “Have you?”

Fili tried to stay composed, though his whole body tensed with the question. “Ha-had my first? Yes, I have.” He wanted Kili to feel as comfortable as possible with this; it wouldn’t help if he became overtly nervous, too.

“Who did you ask?”

“Peniya, of the Yellowstones.”

“Oh.” Kil frowned and looked away again, back towards the river. “Did...did you like it.”

Had he liked it? Fili shrugged. “It was all right. She’s a good one to ask, really. Didn’t blush or anything.” Then he frowned. “Though, that should have been my first clue. I didn’t know it then, but apparently she’s been the first for half the village’s dwarves of age. Actually, she probably likes that a bit too much to be normal.” The last he mumbled mostly to himself. 

Kili pitched another stone in the river. “I don’t want her. I’m not even sure I want a lass at all.”

 _Oh._ Fili did tense then. Why did his heart beat faster? He didn’t mind that Kili wanted a lad…did he? Fili shifted again, stretching out his legs, trying to relax a bit. “Oh, well, that’s all right, then. Some don’t. So...so, do you know who you want?”

“I-I think I do.” Kili seemed very still.

“But you haven’t asked yet?”

Kili drew his legs up to his body and hugged them. “No. I’m not sure I’m going to.”

That answer made Fili feel sad. This should be a joyous time for his brother—though, if he were to be perfectly honest, he’d struggled with his decision, too. “Kili, it’s all right. All dwarves do this. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“I... It’s complicated.”

Fili leaned close and put his arm over Kili’s shoulder. “Can I help?”

Fili never expected Kili to tense, worse yet that he shrugged off Fili’s arm and shot up. “You’re not helping now!” Kili then raced down the riverbank, over the small hill and back towards their house.

At first, Fili didn’t move, so stunned by Kili’s reaction. But then he scrambled to his feet and headed after him. “Kili!”

His mother had come to the door, stepped aside for Kili, her brow raised in surprise. But as Fili approached, she slid over and blocked his entrance.

“So,” she said, wiping her hands with her apron, “that didn’t go well.”

Fili sighed, a little breathless and still surprised. “I’d say not.” Then he gave his mother a little glare. He hadn’t wanted to do this in the first place! “Thanks so much for suggesting it."

His mother nodded, thoughtful, then cuffed Fili against the ear. “Watch your cheek.”

~*~

Fili paced in his room, fussing with the braid of his mustache, every once in a while tugging it hard enough to hurt. By Durin’s beard! He never wanted to have this conversation with Kili in the first place, and now he’d upset him. This was a foreign feeling. Kili never stormed off from him like that—at least, not unless Fili /meant/ to harass him which, Fili admitted, he did do from time to time. It was an older brother’s right, after all.

But this was different, he’d tried to broach a sensitive subject and completely bollocks it.

“Dammit.”

Nothing bothered him more than the idea that he’d hurt his Kili somehow, even by accident. He had to fix this!

With his resolve firmed, Fili left his room for Kili’s and knocked on the door. “Kili?”

“Go away.”

That stung. Kili never told him to go away.

With a sigh, Fili pressed on. “Listen, I didn’t want to upset you. I’m trying to help. Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Why? Because...” Fili hesitated and glanced over his shoulder. Was their mother hovering nearby? By Durin, he hoped not. This was about to get very personal, certainly not for their mother’s ears. Pitching his voice lower, Fili said, “Because you want a lad? Yes, Penyia was my first, but--but that doesn’t mean I haven’t done other things. Remember Nabul?”

The door swung open. Kili gaped at him. “Nabul? Really? He can’t shoot an arrow!”

Fili raised his brow; how much did his brother truly understand about sex? “Yes, well, his archery skills didn’t really come into play.”

Kili turned away, but left the door open. Fili took it as an invitation and closed the door as he slipped inside. Kili continued on, making a dismissive gesture: “And he has little hands.”

Fili grinned and rested his hands on his hips. “His hands weren’t an issue either. However, he has a nice mouth and knows what to do with it.”

Kili spun back around, gaping at Fili again.

Fili grinned. “Did I shock you, brother?” Fili supposed he had, given the flush of red that spread from Kili’s cheeks to his ears. Then Kili plopped down on his bed, a fierce pout on his face, which made Fili sigh.

Had he just made it worse?

Fili crossed to the bed and sank to his haunches at Kili’s feet; he rubbed his brother’s knees. He liked being affectionate with Kili; it made him feel grounded and hoped Kili felt the same. “Kili, it just seems this is causing you much more distress than it needs to. Who is it? Is it someone I know?”

After a moment, Kili nodded.

“Is it someone older?” Fili thought of how this had started, with that silly joke from Dwalin about Kili needing to exercise his /other/ sword. It made him wonder. Hushed, he next asked, “It is Dwalin?”

Kili’s eyes went wide. “No! How could you...no!”

Fili put up his hands. “All right, all right! Not Dwalin.” Fili stood then and sat next to Kili. He wanted to put his arm around him again, but after the riverbank, he wasn’t sure he should. Instead he patted Kili’s knee again. “Just...know that I’m here for you, whatever you need. You’re my brother, my /nadad/, I’d do anything for you.”

Kili lifted his head and looked at Fili, his gaze widened, hopeful. “Anything?”

“Of course!” Sensing that further comfort wouldn’t be rejected, Fili put his arms out. “Come here.”

Kili slid over to put his arms around Fili’s waist, Fili beamed and drew Kil against his chest. He meant it; he’d do anything for Kili. His brother meant the world to him, and always had. Was anyone in all the land more important to him than Kili?

Kili put his head on Fili’s chest and Fili enjoyed the moment, rubbing Kili’s back. It felt even better when Kili returned the gesture, splaying his hands across Fili’s back. Little by little, Kili shifted closer. He slipped his hands under Fili’s shirt. Fili nearly gasped; Kili’s touch felt hot.

That’s when Fili noticed a few things: Kili’s breath came faster, ghosting across Fili’s neck like a gentle touch; he felt Kili’s heartbeat quicken, his skin tacky with a few beads of sweat. And Fili noticed the same of himself.

Then Kili’s hot breath was replaced by his mouth, kissing along Fili’s jawline, small and delicate, intimate and arousing. 

Fili swallowed hard against a dry knot and closed his eyes. “Kili...”

Kili shifted closer still, nudging his nose against Fili’s cheek. “You said anything.”

“You can’t mean...”

Kili’s answer came in a kiss, soft and sweet against Fili’s mouth. But not the kiss of brothers, not a kiss that Fili could pretend meant nothing. A kiss like a lover, a kiss Fili had once dreamed of and then pretended he’d never wanted.

“Wait...”

Kili knelt up, leaning into Fili, kissing at the corner of his mouth, then nudging his nose against his cheek. “I read, in Erebor, brothers used to—“

“STOP!”

Fili found himself standing without really knowing how he’d done it. Kili lay sprawled on his bed, eyes wide, stunned. “Fili...”

But Fili shook his head and backed away until he ran against the door. “I-I can’t.” Yet his body throbbed, needful, telling him to take Kili back into his arms and show him a true, deep kiss, share with him all the things he’d once dreamed about. But he couldn’t—he shouldn’t! He’d made that decision long ago!

He had to escape from the desire thrumming through his body, escape from the longing he thought he’d let go.

Fili pulled open the door and ran. 

 

...TBC...


	2. Part 2

~*~  
Part II  
~*~

Kili had the riverbank; Fili had the old wood pile. It wasn’t much of a wood pile these days. He and Thorin had long ago built a shed to stack cords of wood closer to the house. But Fili still would wander to the old hill where his father used to pile the logs for chopping, then carry them to the house, trip after trip. He said it built character and forearms to carry the logs from the further distance. He wasn’t wrong. No one had swung a fiercer hammer or axe than Fili and Kili’s father.

These days, the wood pile consisted of a few abandoned logs and the weeds and vines that’d grown over them, creating a little hill. It was near the tree line and Fili could sit behind it to be well hidden.

Except from his mother, who knew his habits as well as Fili knew Kili’s.

Fili sat with his knees drawn up to his chest and he stared into the woods. He’d been trying to help Kili, he swore he was! But the look on Kili’s face when Fili pushed him away, it struck in the chest like a punch. He didn’t mean to hurt him; how could he ever explain that it had just been too much, too fast?

It didn’t surprise Fili to hear the slow crunch of footsteps, heading to his hideaway. His mother sat down next to him, crossed her legs, spreading her skirts carefully, then she turned to Fili and gently stroked his arm.

“It’s you, isn’t it.”

Fili nodded.

His mother made a little click with her tongue. “You’re so upset.” She then brushed her fingers through his hair, like she did when he felt ill as a dwarfling. “How long have you had these feelings for him?”

Fili closed his eyes. “Mother...”

“I’m not blind. I remember how you were when you came of age, how you doted on him like a love-struck _dashunâl_. But you did what I hoped you do, you found other outlets. Peniya.”

Fili kicked a nearby log. “I hate her.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“But I do. I picked her and it...it was all wrong.” Fili groaned. “And I even suggested her to Kili, what kind of dolt am I?”

“You’re being too hard on yourself.”

Fili kicked at the log again. “I put all those feelings away, I really did, Mother.”

“I know.”

“Then he started to—“

She gripped his arm stopping his words. “I don’t actually want details. I’m understanding, but you’re still my sons.”

Fili huffed. “Nothing happened. But I...realized.”

“That you’re who he wants to ask.”

“Aye,” Fili said and sagged a little more. His mother returned to stroking his hair, her fingers slipping sweetly against his scalp. But she said nothing. He knew she was letting him sort his thoughts. 

After a moment, he added: “I thought I was over him, I thought I could let all those feelings go.”

“But you haven’t.”

Fili shook his head.

“Then why did you run away from me?”

Fili twisted around the same time as his mother to see Kili standing just beyond the wood pile. He’d snuck up on them quietly as if they were his prey. Kili stared at Fili, looking confused, which Fili supposed made perfect sense. He hadn’t exactly acted clearly and had certainly hurt his dear brother’s feelings. Of course, that was the last thing he’d meant to do.

Their mother moved first, standing and brushing dried leaves from her skirts. “I think I’ll head back home. Dinner needs to be started and I have plenty to do.” She leaned forward and kissed the top of Fili’s head, then kissed Kili’s forehead as she passed him.

Once their mother was a good distance away, Kili took a few steps forward, stopping at Fili’s side and looking down at him. “Why did you run off if you want what I want?”

Fili stared up at him. “I... It’s—“ He thought of how Kili had explained himself earlier. “It’s complicated.” Fili turned back around and sat as he had been, knees to his chest, hugging them close. “You’re my little brother. I’m supposed to look after you. When father died, it became my job.”

Kili climbed down to sit beside him. “I’m not a dwarfling anymore.”

“But you’re still young.”

“Old enough to ask for my first!” Kili leaned near. He was trying to catch Fili’s gaze, Fili could tell. “Did you...did you want to ask me?”

Fili nodded; he couldn’t meet Kili’s gaze.

“Why didn’t you?”

But with that comment, Fili gaped at him. “You weren’t of age!”

Kili huffed and rolled his eyes. “Better me than Peinya.”

Fili snorted softly. “Maybe.”

Mimicking Fili’s pose, Kili drew his legs close to his chest. “You’re lucky you didn’t get the clap.”

“Kili!” Fili stared at his brother again.

“What?” Kili shrugged. “I’ve heard the stories. And Nadur!” His roll of the eyes came with an even more dramatic loll of his head. “I would be much better than him, as well.”

Fili nudged Kili with his elbow. “Such confidence. I thought you haven’t even done anything, yet.”

“Yes, well, I have much stronger hands. I can shoot better than anyone.”

Fili gave him a skeptical look. “I’m not sure why you keep associating archery with sex.”

Kili stayed silent a moment, staring forward. Fili wondered what went through his mind. He didn’t seem as upset or hurt as Fili feared he would. Then Kili shifted closer until he could put his arms around Fili’s waist and lay his head on his shoulder. This was a familiar position. They’d sat together like this, talking for hours, enjoying the comfort of each other’s touch.

After a time, Kili said, “You know I love you, of course.”

Fili tipped his head and rested it against Kili’s. “Like a brother does.”

“No, not just like that. I think I’ve always loved you more than that. Haven’t you?”

Fili closed his eyes. It was true. For as much as he’d tried to deny it to himself for years, he always knew his love for Kili went beyond simple brotherhood. With a sigh, he said, “…yes.”

Kili’s arms tightened around Fili’s waist. “Is it so terrible that we both want this?”

A breeze ruffled Fili’s hair and stirred the tree limbs and bits of dry leaves around them. Fili’s memories of his father were dim and distant, but they all revolved around this wood pile. Fili sensed him stronger here. What would he think? If Fili had taken over the task of looking after Kili after their father died, did this violate it?

Or was it proof of his devotion?

Frankly, Fili wasn’t sure. But he also knew how he felt; he didn’t doubt the love he felt, or the desire.

“I don’t know” was the only answer he could honestly give.

Kili sighed and nestled close. “Well, I know how I feel and who I want and it’s you.” The wind rustled again, stirring Kili’s hair as he shifted to his knees. He positioned himself directly before Fili, resting his hands on his bent knees, looking him straight in the eye. Fili couldn’t avoid his gaze now. “Fili,” Kili started, deliberate and formal, “Son of Hili and of the Durin line, will you be my first lover?”

Fili couldn’t speak. His throat felt tight; he trembled.

Kili didn’t wait for an answer. He parted Fili’s knees and edged forward until they were nearly chest to chest. Fili studied his brother. His dark hair hung loose and wild around his face, stirring with the wind. His beard was dark stubble across his jaw and chin. He always griped about it, how cousin Gimli had more beard than him, but was younger. Yet Fili found Kili’s face to be beautiful. He had the strong bone structure of the Durin line and the wide bright eyes of their mother. No dwarf could ever compare.

Kili leaned close and gently pressed his mouth to Fili’s. Though Kili’s kisses were distinctly arousing to Fili, they were ultimately chaste. Lip to lip, softly touched.

Carefully, Fili cupped Kili’s jaw with both hands, then pressed his tongue forward. Kili gasped, giving Fili access to take the kiss deeper. He went slow, wanting to savor the moment, and not startle Kili. But Kili’s hesitation didn’t last long. He opened his mouth and slowly joined into the kiss. His moan that followed made Fili’s head spin, so erotic and innocent at once.

When the kiss ended, Fili smiled to see Kili’s flushed cheeks and red lips. It didn’t seem possible, but he looked even more beautiful. In a whisper, Kili said, “Come back home with me?”

And Fili could only nod.

 

...TBC...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Khuzdal glossary:
> 
> dashunâl = servant


	3. Part 3

~*~  
Part III  
~*~

For a moment, Fili thought he might laugh—not at Kili, never at him. Nor at the situation, as Kili had taken him by the hand and led him, much like he would a lass, back to their home. No, he thought he might laugh at himself, for being so nervous and excited, like an innocent who knew very little of what was to come. Not even his own first time had felt nearly so momentous as this. What would Kili think if he realized how much his brother trembled?

They hesitated only briefly before Fili's room, but then Kili tugged and led them into his own room. So often, it was in Fili's room where they spent their time. Granted, they were often stringing bows, polishing blades and talking of hunting or fighting, but Kili always found his way into Fili's room, stretched out on Fili's bed, talking at length while Fili sat on the floor beaming up at his brother. They were comfortable there together; it felt familiar. To stand before Kili's bed instead, hand in hand, made the moment seem even more real.

Fili shivered. "Kili?"

"Hm?"

"I have to ask, one more time....are you sure?"

Kili didn't speak and, for a moment, didn't move. Fili instantly berated himself: Why did he ask? Why would he question something he wanted so much, that he’d denied himself for so long? Worse then, Kili let go of Fili's hand. A wave of disappointment washed through Fili's body. Why couldn't he have just trusted Kili to know his mind and accept this gift? No, he had to question it... _one more time_.

But then Kili shifted and slid to stand before Fili. He had a grin as wide as his face and reached to his own collar. He pulled apart the lacings.

"I haven't a doubt."

Fili watched, fascinated, as Kili slowly undressed. First his tunic, then his undershirt, and then he started to untie the lacings of his leggings. Fili certainly had seen Kili undress, but always in a rush of activity, high from a training session or laughing because they'd wrestled in the mud and had been yelled at by their mother as they left splatterings of filthy water in their hurry to reach their rooms. Never had Fili seen him so slowly, carefully, untwine the leather laces then push his leggings so low on his hips, taking his linens with them, that Fili could see the trail of dark hair which ran from his brother's navel down tantalizingly lower.

Kili tilted his head to one side. "Fili, are you all right?"

"Huh?" Fili had to look up to meet his brother's gaze.

Kili eyes seemed to sparkle. "You're staring."

Fili let out a small sigh. "How can I not stare at the beauty that is my brother?"

Kili gasped, wide-eyed. Had what Fili said really been that shocking? Fili knew he'd considered such things many times before, but, of course, he'd never shared them. He grinned, then shrugged. "It's true."

Kili had looked away, still grinning and Fili saw the flush of embarrassment in his brother's cheeks. Did he find that touch of innocence which his brother seemed to lack only a moment ago? But then Kili looked up and had a new glint in his eyes. With a single raised brow and an even wider grin, he reminded Fili of the time Kili had been challenged by an arrogant man to an archery duel. Kili had smiled wildly the whole time because he never once doubted he would win.

Kili reached out and grabbed Fili by the collar. "Come here."

They tumbled into Kili's bed, their mouths meeting like magnetic stones and twisting together as if built to fit by a master stonecutter.

Nothing Fili had ever done before--not with Peniya or Nabul--had ever felt like this! Kili explored Fili's body, touching him to cause gasps and moans. Fili even heard Kili's soft whisper: "It is you who is beautiful, brother."

Fili pulled at his own clothes as Kili finally escaped his leggings and they fit their bodies together to feel the sweet friction of intimate contact. It brought more touches and shifting and rubbing and sighing. Fili knew there was more to this act than what they were doing, but he felt too close to climax to stop or slow now. Besides, with experiences left untried, it kept open the door for a second time. At least, Fili dearly hoped there might be a second time, especially after seeing Kili’s beautiful face alight with orgasm.

As they lay after, sweating and sated, Kili shifted up onto his elbow to look down at Fili. His hair, loose and wild, framed his face like a regal curtain, reminding Fili again of his brother's beauty.

"Did you know that in old Erebor, before even Thorin’s time, that the brother was always the first?"

Fili raised a brow. "Is that so?"

Kili nodded. "Because it was someone trusted and loved and a teacher already to his brother."

Fili reached up to tuck a bit of hair behind Kili's ear. "And how did you learn that?"

"Mister Balin." Then Kili wrinkled his nose and flopped back down to rest his head beside Fili's. "Though, that’s not a story I really wanted to hear, to be honest."

Fili looked away, considering these words. "Wait, you mean…?"

"Yes."

This time Fili propped himself up to look down on Kili. "But they’re both so old!"

Kili laughed. "They weren’t always old. Someday we’ll be old."

Fili gave a little huff. "You’ll always be my little brother," he said as he lay back against the pillow, then added: "Who is lovelier than any lass or lad I’ve seen."

"And can shoot better than anyone."

Fili chuckled. "And can shoot an arrow better than anyone I know."

They were silent for a time, Fili enjoying the way Kili idly stroked his fingers across his chest. He’d half expected his nervousness to return (he hadn’t felt comfortable lying with Peniya for long), but instead a great sense of peace and comfort came over him. Who else but his Kili could make him feel this right and good? 

“So...” Kili finally broke the silence, though he didn’t move from his spot nestled against Fili’s shoulder. “Does this mean you accept my offer?” 

Fili snorted softly, bemused. “To be your first?”

“You never did say.”

“What we did wasn’t enough for you?”

Kili moved then, shifting and bracing his hands on either side of Fili’s head. He stared down at Fili, but he didn’t have his usual wild grin; he looked quite serious.

“No, not enough. I already want more.”

He leaned down and kissed Fili again, but not the chaste first kiss they’d shared or the mad intensity of the kisses which followed. This kiss was deep and slow; sweet and familiar.

A kiss to take Fili’s breath away.

When they parted, Kili said, “You should say it.”

With a smile, Fili nodded. “Fine.” Fili cupped Kili’s jaw, lightly rubbing his thumb across the arch of his cheek. “Kili, son of Hili, of the Durin line, I would be honored to be your first.”

Kili beamed like a darrow given a beloved gift on his naming day. He lay back down, resting his head against Fili’s shoulder again. “I don’t think I’ll ever want another lover.”

Fili felt his nervousness return. Could he hope for so much? But the sensible, elder brother in him made him speak his feared truth. “You can’t know that. You’re young. You have so many more dwarves to meet.”

“I’ll never feel for them what I feel for you.”

“Such a romantic,” Fili said with a chuckle, but his heart soared. 

Though he didn’t say it—not yet—Fili knew he felt the same. The only love of his life lay sweetly in his arms now and he would never desire another. As far as Fili was concerned, this would be the only first time that ever mattered.

 

The End


End file.
